Kiku versus Feliciano
by QueenItalia
Summary: AU. This is about the individual experiences both Kiku and Feliciano shared. This is not Kiku/Feliciano, meaning no yaoi between the two.
1. Chapter 1

Feliciano : A happy Italian. Although he is bipolar in this story, he is still very loving to Ludwig. He will protect him, but most of the time he is a coward and can't speak up. Feliciano also has an obsession with brands and his products. He mentions many brands throughout the story.

Ludwig : He is usually drunk, and always seems to be crying or really depressed. Feliciano upsets him all the time but for some strange reason, Ludwig stays in love with Feliciano. He is a little bit racist, but he still is in love with Feliciano and is very hurt when Feliciano is just with others. Especially when he is with Kiku. Ludwig is very recluse.

Kiku : He is in love with Arthur, who doesn't love him back. He has a hatred towards Ludwig and Feliciano because he feels "betrayed". He is very despondent and angry throughout the story. His only way of making himself feel happy is to torture others at _Unit 731_. Yes, he hates Yao and yes, he does get seasick.

Arthur : He has a strong hatred toward Kiku. Alfred is his true love but Arthur will never admit it. He is a cynical, pessimistic, and irascible nation. He also has the power to see imaginary friends so he may as well be schizophrenic. Arthur is a crybaby in this story because his heart is broken multiple times and he has a very depressing life. Stop judging him with your eyes!

Alfred : A loud and obnoxious American, and always will ruin others' lives for his enjoyment. He is sadistic in that way, and truly has no friends. He just seems popular when really he is so feared and hated. Because he is a stereotyped American, he is Anorexic and watches everything he eats. And of course he has a crush on Kiku, which has suddenly appeared. He also likes Ivan but he cant think when he's around him.

Ivan : The insane, yandere Russian. He likes to be childish and gain points for his childhood, since he didn't have a good one. Ivan has no friends except for communists, and he is a very lonely person. Ivan doesn't like Ludwig, since Ludwig doesn't like him. We all know why. Ivan loves America because he can enjoy a love-hate relationship.

Yao : An old nation. Just kidding, he is a very sage person. Because of this, he thinks he is on top of the world and knows everything. His reputation is mostly wise, old, and bossy. He favors Kiku out of his whole family, which means Yao is not a very good parent.

Francis : The perverted French man. Yes, he is perverted, but also he can be a gentleman and a great father. He is very loving and sincere. Francis will protect his lover, which is Antonio, from about anyone. Even if its his cracked stepson. Francis has a strong hatred towards Poland but learns to like him. (FradavsPolada) Francis is obsessed with brands, roses, red wine, and fancy dresses. He designs the finest clothing.

Gilbert : A conceited, arrogant German who loves to annoy Ludwig. He used to love Feliciano but now loves Mathew. He has a gilbird. Gilbert is Prussia but since that isn't around anymore he is just normal and chill. Still, he has a bad past about the whole defeat and covers it up with things like "I'm so awesome!".

Antonio : A Spanish man who is known for his butt. It even has a special name. He is in love with Francis, but is a little disappointed because Francis is always touching his butt. Antonio used to be a very powerful country, but now he is chill and loves Lovino. He came to earth to twerk. He twerks in the shop when Francis dares him to and gets online.

Felix : Same as Francis, only he is less fashionable. They are both obsessed with_ Chanel,_ which comes from France. Felix is a cross dresser and gets teased a bit for it, but he is still loved. He can stand up for himself and hates Ludwig.

Lovino : A cranky, irascible Italian. He is always cursing and loves Anotio, trying to cover it up by acting as if he hates him. Lovino is also Romano and is Feliciano's brother. He hates Ludwig with a burning passion. He is more depressed nowadays because Antonio cheated on him.

Mathew : Francis's cracked stepson. He got sick and tiered of being ignored and cracked partially. He is soon going to be worse then Ivan soon, run! Mathew loves Gilbert because he was the only one who noticed him before he cracked. Gilbert is spared. Mathew hates his brother, Alfred.

Feli (Italy)

I sprayed on my Italian product, _Guilty Gucci_. Waiting outside was my brother, Lovino, in my _Ferrari_, just waiting outside. He stared impatiently at me, just doing unnecessary things even though all we were going to was the fair.

Yes, I did plan to get dirty and stink, but when you buy your tickets, you never know who is waiting for you. It may as well be some hot chick.

I quickly put on my tie, then rushed outside. "Um, what is that disgusting smell? Never mind, just get in. I don't want to miss the rally going on at twelve!" I nodded, then got in my car.

"Where is the fair at anyway?" Lovino asked. Lovino is always impatient, and lately he has been really irascible.

"I think it's in L.A. I don't know? It's in that area where they shoot fireworks." Lovino got out his phone, then began to locate our destination. "Wait, Lovino, can you drive today?"

My brother was actually delighted, since he drove a pink beetle car, sent as a present by Spain, who got it from France. Lovino had drove around in that thing for so long now, so whenever he got the chance to drive a nice car like mine, he would go for it.

I crawled in the back of the car, then began to snap a picture for my _Instagram_. I think that site is my addiction, besides collecting Iphone cases.

Soon we arrived at the fair. Lovino hopped out of the car, and within seconds he was smothered by Spain.

"Come on Romano, lets go to the ferris wheel." Knowing my brother very well, Lovino hated slow rides.

I was alone now, hoping some hot chicks would come about and ask me out. I waited, but everyone was paired. Some older girls walked past, then looked at me. I waved, blushing. "Are you all alone?" One asked. "Um, yeah. Isn't it a little obvious? Wait, are you asking me if we could chill a bit."

They just kept walking, which left me utterly mad. It had probably been half an hour, and the sky had changed color a bit. I began to get cranky, since this was rare.

Suddenly, out of the blue, Ludwig appeared. He smiled at me with his crooked smile. "Are you alone?" Before I could answer, I felt someone push me. I heard an insane laughter, and completely shocked and freaked out, I spun around.

It was that deranged Russian. "Oh, hey Ivan! Wanna hang out?" I quickly asked, after being neglected for half an hour.

Ludwig quickly spoke up. "Wait, I asked you first!" I turned around to face him. I already know he loves me, he's been chasing me for years now.

"Well, if you want to. Ivan and I are going to the roller coaster!" Ivan rebelled immediately. "No! That thing terrifies me, lets go on those truck things."

I looked at where he was pointing, and it was obvious it was a place for babies. All you could see was a border of sunflowers and little children. "Sure." I said, a little annoyed.

"I like the sunflowers! They are pretty, _da_?" I nodded slowly. We ran to the trucks, Ludwig trailing behind quietly. "I'm not going on that, but I can supervise you."

"Who needs supervision? I'm with a superpower in a place for babies." I heard him mumble something. Probably about Ivan since he was a little cracked. Not to be rude.

We went wild in the baby ride, crashing our trucks violently into other little kids. Their mothers' screamed in terror.

"Feliciano, please be careful. These children are all under seven years!" I ignored him. Ivan suddenly got out of the truck. I gasped. He ran to a random little kids truck and asked him to come out. "No!"

"If you don't get out I'll tell your mommy you're being disobedient!" The kid burst out crying, and Ivan thought it was so funny. Totally funny, making a six year old cry.

"Ivan, I think it's time to go, before the cops come." So we left the ride. "Well then, what now? I sort of want to go on the roller coaster now." Ivan informed us.

"Yeah, me too!" So it was agreed. We pulled Ludwig along with us. "Germany, don't cry on the ride OK?"

He glared at me. "Why would I cry?" I burst out laughing. "When you were drunk you cried." He blushed, probably remembering how that night ended.

Ivan pushed Ludwig to the other end of the crate thing. "No, you sit there. I'm sitting with Feliciano." So I sat next to Ivan, who was screaming even when we weren't even going downhill, the whole entire time.

He screamed in my ear, laughed, then pulled me to his side as soon as he realized we actually were going downhill. Within seconds we were going downhill, and now Ivan was crying and screaming.

Ludwig was all curled up in the corner. I just screamed so Ivan wouldn't feel that bad. All I saw was a blur but it was fun. Soon Russia stopped crying and was back to laughing.

When the ride was over Ivan was jumping up and down, happily. What a great day at the fair. Only, I don't think Ludwig had fun.

Jap (Japan)

I always end a day with _Starbuck's_ coffee. The only problem with today was going with Alfred. As soon as we reached the counter he ordered his way-to-small order. "I want an extra small coffee! How about a low-fat cotton candy frap?"

"It's actually called – Whatever, I'll get a Strawberries & Crème Frappuccino Blended Crème!" I held back my anger. He ordered that on purpose, it's expensive. "Hurry up Kiku, I am so hungry!" He whined.

"OK, I'll get the Shaken Iced Passion Tea." I never get to think. "Why does it always take you so long?" Alfred whined. What an annoying creep. I always want to just throw him in the dumpster, but of course, Arthur will save him.

"Why do you always get iced tea? That stuff tastes gross." I poked him on his cheek. "I always have this because Yao always made me drink it when I was younger."

He giggled. "Yao is so dumb. Take yesterday, I threw my banana peel at the trash and I must of missed cause he was all 'pick that up' and stuff! So I went through all the trouble of picking it up when he could of done it himself."

I took a sip from my beverage, but then that brat poured his Frappuccino in it. He burst out laughing. "You're so cute!" I spat out my beverage on him. Stupid Alfred, thought it was so funny.

"Oh my god, that was even cuter! I love you so much!" I felt as if the whole room was watching us. "Alfred, quiet down please."

He spat some of his Frappuccino on me all of a sudden, laughing again. I realized I was trembling from rage, so I quickly stopped.

"That looks like a lot of calories. Gee, I think you spat 100 calories on my face. Maybe you should be more careful on what you order instead of trying to impress me all the time with your money." Alfred immediately stopped laughing. "Um, I wasn't trying to impress you, amd for once I can eat something fatty, right?"

I stared at him for a long time in silence. "OK, you're creeping me out. I'm calling Iggy over!" He mentioned Arthur's nickname. Quickly, I ran to the bathroom while he dialed Arthur's number.

I suddenly forgot why I came to the bathroom in the first place, then saw my face on the mirror. I gasped in horror. There was Frappuccino all over my face. Wanting to scream, I kicked the mirror.

Alfred walked in smiling. "I'll wash my face too." He splashed water on me. He can never be neat. He always needs to ruin someone's day! Thats one thing I absolutely hate about him.

Feli

So tomorrow is October 3rd, which is Ludwig's birthday. We went out shopping for supplies, only he wasn't that keen on going. So we went to a fancy looking shop. "Should we get some flowers in vases. Arthur has _Royal Doulton_ we could borrow for a vase. Does it sound nice and royal?"

"I don't care about luxury brands, all I want is beer." I smiled. "I know you want some designer brand in your house."

But I didn't hear what he said because immediately my eyes spotted the most fabulous thing ever. It was a vase with ships and Italian architecture on it. I almost fainted, what a rare masterpiece. This wasn't any vase though, it was my vase. It was on sale for a million dollars. Maybe because it was dating back to the Renaissance.

Ludwig came over to me. "Whats this?" He asked. "It's my vase! It's from the Renaissance." Ludwig patted my head. "I found some autumn flowers, they would look good on my door." I nodded, still staring at the vase in awe.

"Feli, I want these flowers." I ignored him, which made him angry. "Feliciano! Can you hear me!? I want them!" I was still looking at the vase. Now my hand went inside the vase. "Feliciano Vargas! I want those flowers!" He ran to me, then unexpectedly, knocked down the vase. "Ludwig!? What's your problem!?" I screamed, finally annoyed.

"I want those flowers!" What a ridiculous man. "Then go get them!" Ludwig held out his hand. "What, you want to dance?" He blushed. "_Nein_, I need money. Your wallet." I pulled out my wallet, then gave it to him. "_Danke_."

We finally finished shopping, now it was time to eat. "Ludwig, lets go get some burritos!" I cried, happily jumping around him. I was probably extremely annoying and embarrassing.

"Calm down, how about some beer?" I didn't have a good idea about this but didn't reject. "Sure, where at?"

Jap

Yet another stressful day. I was going to buy Ludwig a present for his birthday, only he didn't deserve one. I went shopping anyway since that loser wouldn't get any anyway.

I bought him his favorite thing in the world; Beer. Since it's the month of October, it must be the October Fest thing those Germans have.

I put it in a leather box, then wrapped a red satin bow around it. While carrying the present to the mail box, I passed by Arthur. Quickly I dropped the box, then heard a loud sound. The sound of shattering glass.

Arthur stared at me in disgust, which was really painful. "Clumsy, you should be more careful when carrying glass."

"Yes, next time. What are you doing on my... street?" Arthur raised a brow. "Your street? I'm pretty sure others live around here."

"Yeah, they do." He picked up the box, then handed it to me. "Who is the box for, it better not be for America."

"Oh, it's for Ludwig." I answered, blushing. "Oh, it is his birthday, huh?" I nodded. "Yeah, it's tomorrow. I got him beer."

"Oh did you?" He almost sounded annoyed. "Well I was just jogging, see you around." I didnt want him to leave though, he needed to stay. Quickly, without thinking, I shouted, "You look really tiered! Do you want to come in my house?"

He stopped his pace, then turned around. "Actually, I am quite tiered, but it doesn't stop me from losing weight." He obviously didn't want to be around me.

"Wait, I brought scones over. I just thought you would like them." Arthur stopped running, realizing probably that he was stuck now. "No, I'll keep running. I'd rather run then be with you in _your _house!" He began sprinting down the street. I laughed a bit, trying to make it look like I wasn't hurt when really, I was feeling really dejected.


	2. Chapter 2

Feli

Ludwig's party is turning out great. All our guests began rolling in. Francis was first, dragging along Antonio. "Ew, why does it stink in here so much?" He asked, holding his nose.

Antonio shrugged. Francis went straight for the candy. Next came Alfred. "Hey, this party is going to be great! I just know it!"

I smiled. Finally positiveness. "Where is the low-fat food? I'm so hungry I could eat you!" I played along. "Oh don't eat me! The low-fat is at that table." Alfred rushed with Arthur to the low fat table saying in bright letters _Germany's Low-Fats_.

Soon everyone arrived. Japan came in last. "Why are you so late?" Japan glared at me. "I was getting ready. Here is Ludwig's present, sorry it's wrapped in cheap stuff, my last present broke."

I took the present and set it down by a pile of presents. Most of them were from me, just feigning signatures.

Ludwig came up to me. "Want some beer, its good for you." I shook my head, nervous that he was drunk. He began to shiver. "Take it Italy, take it!" I snatched the bottle out of Ludwig's shaking hands. "OK, fine! Happy?"

Ludwig nodded. "_Ja_, is that Kiku I see? Who invited him?" Before I could stop Ludwig, he was already walking up to Kiku in his drunk state.

Kiku sized him up for a moment, then crossed his arms. "What? Are you drunk?" I could feel a fight brewing between the two.

"_Nein, _why are there so many of you?" I slapped my forehead. What a complete idiot, he is drunk. "Wonderful, I'm going to go eat." Kiku picked up some cake, then began taking small bites out of it. Thats when Ludwig slapped the bottom of the plate. I gasped.

The room was quiet. Ludwig walked over to his presents and picked up Kiku's. "I wonder what's in here? Cheap junk?"

Kiku went red in his face. Ludwig ripped open the packaging, then revealed a beer bottle. "Oh, thank you Kiku! Thank you!" Instead of drinking it though, Ludwig threw it on the ground. The bottle shattered.

The room burst out laughing. Kiku looked really humiliated as if he was about to cry, so he ran off. I followed him, but he was already driving off.

I returned to Ludwig, horrified. "Why did you do that?" I asked, feeling really sorry for Kiku. "Oh, sometimes you just got to get them back."

Jap

Yesterday was horrible! Today all I did was stay in my room and do some_ Instagraming._ Yao walked in without knocking and asked me why I didn't come out for dinner. "Ludwig! He ruined my life! But don't you worry, I'll get him back!"

Yao sighed. "Oh, OK. I'll just give you noodles now?" I shook my head. "No, I'll just starve myself till this whole nightmare goes away."

"That isn't a positive way of thinking, you'll never reach enlightenment." Yao was annoying me so I shut my door on him.

I decided my revenge on Ludwig would involve violence, since he deserved it. Later that day I headed to Ludwig's house. I knocked on the door, waiting. It had been a whole minute and he didn't answer. I knocked again.

Then I listened close and heard voices. Ugh! Ludwig was in the house, he was deliberately ignoring me.

I started banging on the door, but that German still didn't come. "Open up the door! Hurry up or I'll _shoot_ the knob out!"

Finally the door opened. Instead of Ludwig, it was Feliciano. "Feliciano? Where is Ludwig!?" But that Feliciano pushed me away. "Don't just barge in my house, you were not invited!"

"Where is Ludwig?" Feliciano shrugged. "Not here, go somewhere else." But I knew Ludwig was in the house. "Move Feliciano Vargas!" I ordered. He didn't move.

"Move! I need to inspect!" He grabbed my shoulders and shook me. "Stop shaking me!" I took out my gun, then held it to his face. "Alright, fine! Go ahead!"

I pushed past him, then ran upstairs. Unfortunately, I couldn't find Ludwig. This house was so big, most of it was red, black, white, or yellow. What an ugly house.

Finally, I caught him running downstairs.

Feli

I wanted to get out my rifle at the corner of the room and shoot Kiku. He not only barged into my house without permission, but he held a gun to my face. Gee, what a _friend_!

"Stop!" I heard him say. He seized Ludwig's arms, then pulled him down the stairs. "What did Luddy do? Please tell me!" But I knew very well why Kiku was doing this.

Kiku dragged Ludwig outside, then shoved him into a van. "Wait!" I called out. The car was already pulling out of the driveway. Quickly, I got in my _Ferrari, _then chased Kiku's car. After a while of stalking, I reached the airport.

Why were they going to the airport. Then I saw Kiku rushing out of his car, with Ludwig, to a private jet. That jet was heading to Japan! I of course, was too slow. But I was fast at the same time. I ran to my private jet and ordered to go to Japan.

On the jet I fell asleep. All I had were pasta, spaghetti, and wine. When I realized we had past the time zone line thing, I was wide awake. "Are we there yet!?" I asked my private pilot. "Yeah, actually, we are. We just arrived."

I quickly brushed my hair, put on some _Guilty Gucci_, and ate breakfast. When my jet landed, so did Kiku's. I followed them some more, but this meant I was traveling through forests.

I followed them through a forest trail. Ugh, the forest got scarier each glance. Kiku kept looking back as if I was still following him, which I was. Ludwig looked tiered. He probably got zero sleep on that jet.

The trail got dark, and there was a bunch of dead trees now. Now I saw a familiar building. It had broken walls, torn window screens, and broken glass.

_You're Not Welcome To Unit 731!_ Great place already. I remember coming here during World War Two. This place always scared me.

I followed him inside, then hid underneath a table, which was so dusty and old. "Ludwig, do you know why you're here?"

Ludwig, of course, said nothing. I looked away, wondering why I had even came in the first place. I was already regretting my decision. Then I felt my butt vibrate. Oh no! My phone, why did I set up 3G? Now it was beeping very loudly. "Crap!" I whispered to myself. I reached in my back pocket and now the ring tone was louder. Quickly I answered. "Hello?"

"Is this Feli?"

"Yeah... talk quietly."

"Why?"

"Just talk quietly! Who is this?"

"It's Alfred!"

"What do you want?"

"Oh, do you know where my headphones are?"

I slapped my forehead. Quickly I hung up and blocked everyone on my contacts list. Thank god Kiku didn't hear it. Plus my ring tone is embarrassing, it goes like "we movin' like Richard, we movin' like Richard" over and over again.

Oh my god, it is from this YouTube video. Then I decided to check my _Twitter. _So much feed. I began to _tweet_ when I heard some banging. I stopped_ tweeting_, then looked over at Kiku and Ludwig who were now wrestling each other for a gun.

"It's mine!" I ignored and went back to _Tweeting_. I really wanted to check my _Instagram_ now. I looked at my feed._ Thousand New Friends, Fifty-Thousand New Comments, and Three-Hundred Pictures Of You. _

Wow, the typical. I looked back at Kiku and Ludwig. Ludwig had gotten hold of the gun and he threw it out the window. I gasped, but quietly. Japan ran to the window, apparently trying to get his gun.

Ludwig pulled him away. Kiku grabbed Ludwig and pushed him around for a little bit. Rather girly gestures.

Ludwig grabbed Kiku, pulled down his cap, and threw him against a wall. I sort of wanted to laugh, but at the same time cry. "Stop fighting! Why cant we just make peace like_ Feliciano_ says?" He mentioned my name.

"How about some beer?" Ludwig stood straight. "_Ja_, that would be nice." Kiku headed to some boxes just outside. "How about some German beer. It's good for you. Nice, healthy beer." I knew Ludwig couldn't have beer, he had Gastritis.

"Stop! He's not going to have beer!" I screamed by accident. Kiku shrieked, then jumped behind Ludwig. I got out from under the table. "He's cant have beer and he wont!" Kiku took out a bottle of beer from the box.

"Oh, what a pity Ludwig. I guess they're mine now!" I felt like punching Kiku. "You don't even drink beer, you even admitted, you _hate _beer!"

He threw the beer bottle at me, missing. I watched it shatter against some rock. "Who cares, I do now!" If he wanted to play a game, then game on. "You can't change your taste though."

"Yes you can! I did!" I rolled my eyes. "Actually its scientifically proven. Not kidding." He glared at me. "Shut up Feliciano, your taste buds gradually change."

He opened a beer bottle and began to drink it. It was a little obvious he didn't like it though. "See, I like beer! It's so nice. To bad Ludwig cant have this nice, cold beer."

Ludwig blushed. "_Ja_, I'll have one!" He said, stupidly. Kiku shook his head. "No, its _bad_ for you. You have Gastritis."

Ludwig must have had enough because after Kiku took a second bottle he just pounced on him like an uncivilized bobcat. I don't know.

Ludwig smashed a beer bottle on Kiku's face. "Ugh! Ludwig! Get off him!" I screamed, uncontrollably. Ludwig ignored me and began to twist Kiku's arms behind his back.

"Damn inferior sub-human!" Ludwig shouted. I stood in complete shock. "Ludwig, please get off him!" I was ignored once again. I looked away, not wanting to see anymore. It was already traumatizing enough that my ears were ringing. I covered my ears and tried to imagine a different world.

_Imagine what it would be like if I had the most followers on Instagram... or the most likes. Maybe if on Twitter my posts get over a billion retweets. That would be nice._

I stopped thinking and glanced at Kiku and Ludwig. "Get off me, get off me, get off me! I surrender! I surrender!" I felt little tears rolling up in my eyes. "Ludwig, leave him alone!" Then I realized all this happened because of beer. All _this_, over beer. But an even worse thought. All this happened cause of_ me_ stopping Germany from having beer.

"Ludwig! There is beer at my house, if you get off him you can have it!" Kiku glared at me. "You idiot! He can't have beer!" I sighed. _OK, all I have to do is pull Ludwig away. Or I will lure him away. _I picked up a bottle of beer and held it to Ludwig's face. "Ludwig, its _all _yours."

Ludwig stopped all that he was doing to Kiku and came up to me. "For me? Really?" I nodded. "But you have to come and get it!" So we went on a little chase in the forest, far away from that _Unit 731_ place. Well, at least I thought we did. I turned around in the middle of the chase and realized he wasn't following me.

Jap

Yesterday was terrible but I now have that German locked up in Unit 731! I called up Yao to assist me to experiments.

"What kind of experiments?" He asked. "Oh, just ones that involve torturing Ludwig! Just come!" My wish was granted, thankfully.

"Well? What I came here for? Come on, I have to go to some game thats really important to me." I took him to a field. "Go make Ludwig run the field, and if he stops, then you whip him! Do you understand, Yao?" He looked shocked when I said his name. "Sure. I don't see how thats an experiment though."

He took Ludwig out to a field and started to make him run around. I got out my checklist and wrote a new goal. _Next I'll just cut open Ludwig's arm, then I'll pour sea water on it to make it hurt him even more! _

China soon came running up to me. "He looks really burnt out. Can we do this another time?" I nodded. "Yeah, I have a new goal anyway." He smiled, but it looked really forced.

We lead Ludwig to a dark room with cobwebs all over. I wondered how the room would look if it was clean.

"Go sit down Ludwig, and wait there! Don't move!" I ordered. He looked confused with where to sit. "Where?" He asked, out of breath. "Are you blind!? Over by the desk!" Yao said, which really irritated me. _Shut up Yao, you will be the next one here!_

I reached in my pocket and pulled out a pocket knife. Ludwig was going to regret all that he did yesterday. Slowly, I began to cut his arm. He squirmed and then began screaming and kicking. "Why are you doing this to me!?" He asked, while crying.

"You humiliated me! You don't remember? How about I jog your memory a bit?" I took a beer bottle from outside and went back to Ludwig. Immediately I dropped the bottle on the ground.

"That is what all this is about? Over that stupid reason?" I nodded. "Yeah, and I hate you anyway!" He started crying again. "Oh no! Yao, we don't even _have_ sea water! Wait, I could just mix salt and water together." I ran to the tap outside a filled an empty beer bottle with water, then I put some salt in it from the refrigerator, which didn't work anymore.

By the time I came back to Ludwig, he had stopped crying. "Ludwig, it's beer." I poured it on his cut. He immediately began kicking and screaming again. "Stop! It hurts!" I stopped pouring the salty water on him. The whole image was sickening, but in a good way.

"Did you learn your lesson yet or am I going to have to pour this on you _again_?" He shook his head. "_Nein! _Get away from me! I want Feli!"

"Well Feli isn't coming! He doesn't love you! That's why he ran away from you yesterday!" Yao stared at me, obviously clueless to what we were talking about. "Stop looking at me like that! Why don't you leave!? I don't need you anymore!"

He rushed out of the room. "Ludwig, you aren't loved and you'll never be! You have no friends! Why don't you just go kill yourself!?" He looked shocked by my words. "I do have friends, I have Yekaterina and Feliciano!" I began to laugh at him, harshly. "You have no friends, if she was your friend she would come and save you!"

"She cant come cause she doesn't know where I even am! And if she did, she would come to save me! She is my friend, so she'll save me!"

"Then go call her!" I gave my phone to him. "Um... now?" He asked shakily. I didn't feel like answering a dumb question. "Hurry up, go call her!" He quickly dialed in her number.

"Hello? Hello? Please answer!" I snatched my phone away after a minute of him repeating "hello" over and over again. "She didn't answer! She hates you!" But the real reason was because this was my phone and she had blocked my number.

"Whatever, she is still my friend! She is probably busy with something." I pulled Ludwig, by his hair, out of the room. "Go run the track and don't stop till I say so!"

Feli

I completely forgot about the incident two days ago. I was out shopping for food with Antonio, Francis, and Lovino. Lovino and I were really bored. We were just trailing after them, bored and tiered.

"Lets go eat already! I'm so hungry!" Lovino complained. "I know right! Come on, lets go buy some food!" Francis said. "No, right now! Lets eat right now!" Lovino was getting on my nerves now. "Just wait_ fratello_, its not that long."

So we entered the Nugget shop. Francis all of a sudden began squealing and jumping around. "OMG! Antonio, I dare you to twerk!" Antonio sighed. "Francis, not in public."

"Come on, twerk." Francis tried to twerk but failed. Antonio sighed again. "I don't have the butt for it." Francis gasped. "You don't have the butt? You're butt is a perfect, round butt, its the twerking butt! You came to earth to twerk!"

Antonio looked a little dejected. "Gee, thanks Francis, but I don't think right now is the best time." Lovino nodded. "Yeah Francis, so shut up! He'll embarrass us all!"

Francis began whining now. "Just twerk already! We all want to see." But we didn't all want to see. Twerking in public like this, I don't think so.

"No, no twerking." Francis began to shake his butt in fast motion but he shook his whole body. "Francis, if you stop doing that I'll twerk."

Francis immediately stopped. "OK, twerk!" Antonio raised a brow. "How do I know you'll stop?" Francis thought. "Pinky swear!" So they pinky swore.

"OK, fine. You asked for it." Antonio got on those walls with all the food on them and began to twerk. Francis and I doubled over in laughter. Lovino looked like he wanted to die. He closed his eyes and began to pull his face in frustration.

"On the ground!" Francis ordered. We both burst out laughing again. Antonio began to twerk on the ground, now Lovino was going really red in the face.

"On the wall!" We couldn't stop laughing. Antonio just knew how to twerk. He was a pro at it. All of a sudden some police men walked in.

"Why are you twerking in public. A little old lady reported you, Antonio." Antonio gasped. "How do you know my name!?"

The police man took off his cap and revealed the profile of Arthur Kirkland. "Sorry about this, but you either spend a night with me at my house or pay five hundred dollars." Antonio gasped. "Um, Officer Kirkland, can you let me go once?"

"No, I'm sorry." Lovino punched Arthur in the face all of a sudden. "Lovino! What was that all about?" Lovino began blushing. "Um, nothing... It was for your own good!" Antonio helped Arthur off the ground.

"Stupid Lovino, do you wish to replace Antonio's place?" Arthur shouted, going red in the face. "No! You were just getting on my nerves!" Lovino replied. "So don't think you're so great to be a police man, you aren't always one anyways!"

"Damn brat! Antonio, you need to teach him some proper manners!" Arthur held out his hand for five hundred dollars. "Um... I didn't bring that much money."

"Oh really, is that why you have millions of dollars back home!? Come on, hand it over!" Antonio got out his wallet, it was an alligator skin wallet from_ Gucci._ Of course, Francis influenced.

"Um, is it OK if I give you a thousand dollars?" Arthur nodded, looking at his watch. "Oh, nice watch Arthur, where'd you get it?" I asked.

He smiled. "Oh, this watch is from _Cartier_." While I tried to sidetrack Arthur, Antonio reached in his pocket and pulled out another wallet. He took out five hundred dollars and exchanged the money into his own wallet. Quickly he put it back, then dusted himself off as if nothing happened.

"How much was your recent watch?" He didn't answer. "Antonio, where's the money!? I don't have all day!" Antonio giggled, then handed over five hundred dollars.

Arthur smirked. "You fool! This is _my_ money, its in pounds! Don't try to trick me next time, now get in my car!" Antonio laughed nervously. "Yeah... OK."

So Antonio went for a ride in a police car that day. Lovino and Francis just stared at me. "That bastard doesn't know how dumb he is!" Lovino suddenly said.

So we bought some food in silence, then returned home. On my YouTube feed I gasped. Antonio's actions of twerking in the store ended up on line! I watched the video two times before laughing so hard I went blue.

"Whats so -" Romano didn't even finish before he burst out laughing too. "Oh my gosh, what an_ idiota_!"

Jap

I decided to check my YouTube feed. I suddenly gasped._ Spanish Man Twerking In Public. _I tapped on the link. Immediately it showed Antonio twerking on the floor and walls. Later in the video he got caught by the police and thats where the video stopped. Finally I was actually laughing.

I shared the video on _twitter_, and finally got over one hundred thousand _retweets_. Ludwig came out of the corner of the room, moaning. "Are you OK? You are moaning and its giving me a headache! Shut up!"

Before he could reply I heard a knock on the door. Quickly I rushed to the door, beating Ludwig. He was probably trying to escape. "Hello?"

"Ah, yes, hello. Its me, Yao, and Mathew wants to see Ludwig." I rolled my eyes. "So? I'm not giving away Ludwig! He's mine! And why does Mathew want him?"

"He didn't say, but he is angry with you." I sighed. "Fine! I'll go! Now?" He nodded. "OK, um... I'll be at the airport." Before he could say anything I slammed the door shut.

"Ludwig, Mathew wants you. I don't know why though." Ludwig was still. "_Ja_, OK." He put on his military cap. I pulled him out the door and ran to Yao's car.

"OK, I'm driving!" I quickly said. Yao sat in the back with Ludwig. I drove as fast as I could to the airport. I rushed out of the car until Yao screamed, "Wait!"

"What now, Yao?" I asked, impatiently. "Um, Mathew has closed all direct flights to Canada for Japan." I gasped. "What!? So how do I get to Canada? What does he expect!?"

"Um, he expects you to travel on a ship." I gasped in horror. "What!? On a s-ship? Um... well, we don't have any ships available in Japan." Firstly, I hated ships because they took too long. Secondly, I always got seasick on ships. Lastly, being on a ship with Yao and Ludwig would be a living hell!

"Yes there are." Yao replied with a straight face. "No there isn't! I refuse to go on a ship, tell Mathew I can't travel on ships. They take way to long!"

"But he won't let you travel on plane. Sorry Kiku." I sighed. "Fine! But this better be worth all this! I hate wasting my time on crap like ships when you could just use nowadays travel!"


	3. Chapter 3

Feli

"So you're going to want to put on a smoky eyeshadow. You know, just for increased drama." I rolled my eyes. "Alfred, first of all, we aren't girls. Stop giving us makeup tutorials for Vampires on Halloween. How about a manly look?"

"Don't get fresh with me." Alfred declared. "OK, Alfred, listen, I understand you are trying to help but we need manly looks. You aren't the next_ Macbarbie07_."

"Who said I was trying to be?" I sighed. "OK, I'm just going to leave." I left the mansion. Gosh, Alfred's mansion was so big. It was nearly the size of a castle in medieval days. Maybe it was a replica of one, who knows.

I ran to my_ Lamborghini _outside. Quickly I drove away. "I wonder what I should be for Halloween anyway? Maybe a minion from that movie."

Soon I arrived back at my house. "Time for a bath!" I told myself. "No, time for a spanking!" It was Lovino. "Why!? What did I do?"

"Nothing. I was playing." I nodded slowly. "Oh, and by the way, how come that potato bastard doesn't come anymore? Not that I want him."

"Oh my gosh! Thanks for reminding me!" I rushed out of the house and to my _Ferrari_. Quikcly I began driving. All of a sudden I got a call. "Yes, what?"

"It's Kiku."

"Oh hey. Um, where's Ludwig?"

"You don't just ask me that question. He isn't in Japan though."

I hung up. This was useless. Instead I decided to go to our local Crabby Patties. It's also know as _Burger King_.

Jap

Ludwig was mopping the deck the whole day. "Ludwig, why are you always working?" I decided to ask. "It's none of your business."

"Well I'm just curious to know. No one told you you had to." He stopped mopping the deck and turned directly to me. "Mind your own business." He said.

"Just answer the damn question." He ignored me and went back to mopping. I kicked over the bucket of water he was using. "There, now answer my question."

He picked up the mop, then shoved its wet side on my face. Finally, after my hair was soaked, I stopped asking questions.

Feli

I decided to keep in my mind that Ludwig was OK. So to keep a happy frenzy, I decided to play a sport. Not a crazy, stressful one, but a clam and dignified sport.

The perfect person for that was Arthur. I called up Arthur and he said it was OK. I drove to his house, then got my sports gear.

"Ready!" I called out. Arthur immediately ran down stairs, extremely happy. "Good, you came! I had a feeling you would leave me." I shook my head. "Why would I do that?" He shrugged, then took me out to his backyard.

"Wow, this backyard is amazing." Arthur smiled. "Oh, Alfred always says it's for old people, I think its rather nice. Thank you."

We set up the court and began to play. He was pretty good, but I was too fast for this game. I always missed the shuttlecock. "You're getting better, just keep practicing!" I nodded.

Suddenly my racket hit the shuttlecock. It went flying over to Arthur's side and hit Arthur in the face. He fell down, screaming. "Ouch, oh my gosh! You hit my face!" I backed away from him. "Oops! Sorry! I suck so much at this game!"

He immediately began crying. "Yes you do! You suck so much!" I tried to shrug it off and be casual. "Um, yeah. Maybe we shouldn't play this anymore."

"I think you're right! Lets not play this game, you ruin everything!" I helped him off the ground. "How about some tea inside?" He agreed with the idea.

Finally I got him to stop crying. "Sorry about the game." He smiled. "Oh, it was OK. You're pretty good for a beginner." I took a sip from the tea. "Have you ever tried putting spice in?" I asked him. "Oh no, does it taste good?"

"Of course it does, try it! I brought tea spice with me." He held out his cup for the spice. I poured it in, hoping he would like it. "It's splendid!"

"I knew you'd like it!" I yelled, in complete shock and joy simultaneously. "So have you ever played Badminton with Alfred?"

He stopped drinking his tea. Then some tears rolled up in his eyes. "He never wants to play with me." He got on the ground and began crying loudly. "Um... I'm pretty sure you've played once."

"We have. He hit my face on purpose with the shuttlecock." I felt guilty now. "Oh, what else?" He stood up and threw his tea cup at the wall. "He kept hitting me with it. I tried to laugh it off but really it hurt me."

I patted his back. "Want to see my _Rolex_ watch collection?" He pushed me away. "No, I don't care about your collection! I just want love from my little brother!"

He ran upstairs and slammed some door shut, probably the door to his room. I decided to leave the house.

Jap

I had been waiting for this moment. This moment was always supposed to happen, especially when you're traveling on a ship. You just know this is going to happen cause it always happens. It's suppose to happen, other wise, how else would you reach land? You need to be on the ship.

"Yao, can I tell you something really important that you can't tell Ludwig." He smiled at me. "Yeah, what is it-aru?"

I felt a little embarrassed to tell him this. "Oh, never mind Yao! You wouldn't understand me!" I quickly ran off. Without looking, I crashed into Ludwig. "Ugh! What now!?" He screamed, holding up his mop.

"Nothing." To tell the truth, Ludwig was actually very frightening at this moment. Especially if he had a gun around his waist. I needed to confiscate that gun.

"Ludwig! Hand over your gun!" Ludwig took his gun, then froze. He narrowed his icy blue eyes. "Why? You're not going to shoot me are you?"

"Of course I won't, just hand it over." He gave me the gun. "Ludwig, I feel a little bit... not that I'm weak or anything, but I feel sort of – I don't care!"

I backed far away from Ludwig. It was useless just asking these two freaks. I called Feliciano, he would understand me. "Um, Feliciano, are you there?"

"Yeah, I'm here!"

"Um, it's Kiku."

"Oh, nope! You took away Ludwig! Unless you tell me where he is, I won't talk to you!"

I hung up. Yekaterina was nice, but she was kind of slutty. I called her anyway. "Hey, is this Yekaterina?"

"Why, yes it is, who's speaking?"

"It's um... an anonymous fan of you."

"I checked the number, I'm not stupid."

"I thought you blocked me!"

"I unblocked you, Alfred came over and told me to unblock you. Why did you call?"

"Um, cause I don't feel comfortable talking to anybody else with this."

Then all of a sudden that German took my phone away, then threw it in the ocean. "Hey! I was in the middle of a conversation! Why did you do that!?"

"You were talking to Yekaterina, she's my friend!" That was why he threw my new IPhone 5 in the water? My updated IPhone 5S?

I sighed, then looked at the water. Some dolphins were following the ship. The only thing to keep me sidetracked was those dolphins.

Ludwig watched them too. "Why are you looking at dolphins?" He asked, all of a sudden. "Oh, I was just wondering how nice it would be to eat one."

"That's disgusting!" He walked away. Looking at the water made me feel even sicker than before. Why did I always get seasick? I wasn't suppose to, especially if I was a country in the Pacific ocean.

I decided to keep it to myself, I couldn't tell anyone my weaknesses. But then I felt a rush of vertigo. Quickly I ran to the back of the ship where no one was. At least I think no one was there. Quickly I pulled down my cap and threw up in it.

I felt immediately like trash, then began shivering. I decided to play apps, but then I remembered that German threw my phone in the ocean...

Feli

Poor Arthur, I wish I could hug him. I felt really guilty about the whole Badminton match. Poor guy, why was Alfred always so mean to his brother?

I decided to call over Alfred to have a talk with him, I wanted to resolve this conflict. He came over, well he was driven over by his chauffeur.

"What? You wanted me over? What?" I found him extremely rude. "Don't 'what' me. Sit down, we need to have a talk."

"Hey, you said we'd play Football out the back?" I sighed. "Um, no." He sat down on my couch. "What? Hurry up!"

"Calm down, Alfred. Why are you so mean to Arthur? Why can't you learn to love him?" Alfred glared at me. "No! No way!" I sighed. "Just answer the question."

"He is firstly an ugly British man, secondly, he is an old British man, and lastly, he is the most boring British man ever!"

"You almost sound like you hate all that." I said, in some state of shock. "I do! You have a problem?" I shook my head. "No, but that's not right!"

"Well there you go, you do have a problem!" He got up to leave. "Wait, sit down Alfred! We aren't done yet!" He ignored me and ran out the door. "Fine! Run! No one likes you anyway! We all hate you!"

I slammed my door shut and locked it. He deserved to be hated globally, it's cause his damn attitude. I ran to my room, and to cool myself off, played a Wii game. It's called _Super Smash Bro's Brawl_.

It's honestly the best game ever. Even though its violent, it doesn't make me aggressive. Or does it?

Jap

Finally, after days of traveling on a ship, we arrived in Canada. I found Mathew just outside the docks, and he was smiling to himself, in his uniform, all happy and cheerful. I tried to hold back my anger, but I couldn't.

I ran up to him and shouted, "Why did you make me travel on that ship!? Why can't I travel on planes!? Is there something wrong with you!? Do you even know how hard it is to travel on a ship!? No! You don't!"

I realized the people around were laughing at me with their Canadian laugh. "Gee, I didn't know it was that hard. I travel just fine."

"Well I don't! Why did you call me here?" Mathew thought. "Oh, I just wanted to make sure you knew how our relationships were."

"That's the only reason!? Ugh, you made me waste my time!" He grabbed my hair, then pulled me to the back of the building we were in front of. "Yeah, that's the only reason."

"That doesn't make sense! What do you mean?" I regretted asking that. He pounced on me like an uncivilized being, then began to rip my uniform.

I grabbed my gun, then held it to his neck. He immediately got off, then smirked. "You can tell Yao and Ludwig how weak you are now."

"I'm not weak! Why did you call me!? Surely that wasn't the reason!" He nodded. "It was though, until you pointed that _gun_ to me."

"I was only protecting myself, are you insane? What happened to the timid Mathew Williams who easily joined my empire?"

"Oh, that timid Mathew isn't taking that anymore! I will rule the world one day and _everyone_ who ignored me will _pay_!" He started to laugh like Ivan now, who was insane.

"Um, yeah, I'm going to leave now. I'll just go back to my house in L.A." He seized my arms all of a sudden. "Stop it! Get off me, you're freaking me out!" He held on tighter.

I tried to get free from his tenacious grip, but this was impossible. "Get off me, you'll always be inferior to me!"

"No I wont!" He bit my arm, then pushed me on the ground. I looked at my arm. There were teeth marks on it, which was actually pretty disgusting.

"Kiku, come to my house this evening, then I'll tell you why you came here!" I gritted my teeth. "No! I already know what you're going to do!"

He began to laugh harshly, then left. I decided I wouldn't go to his house. It was way to risky.

Feli

Lord o' mighty! I was just reading the news and on the front page... Mathew William's face. I pictured they must of gotten away with putting camera's on the top of the house.

_Mathew Williams, or CANADA, has officially cracked. Yesterday he was caught attacking Kiku Honda, or JAPAN, and the two were seen in the back of a building. They began to argue over inferiority and then Mathew -_

I crumpled the News Paper into a ball, then threw it at a door. "Damn it! Ludwig is in Canada!" Yes, that was what I cared about. My Ludwig was probably missing me. I wanted to cradle him in my arms, I just love the way he starts blushing and his warm cheeks touch mine. I just want to squish him. Squish his little head.

He's the most adorable thing ever! Why does he have to be so damn cute?


End file.
